Dear Janice, I suspect a colleague is stealing.

Not large amounts or big items (although that could be true also), I mean odd, silly things that are generally just lying about.

For instance, my scarf just disappeared and I assumed I had left it on the bus. A pen I was given as a present vanished. Lipliner, phone charger, and a number of other items have gone too. Like most of my colleagues, I leave bits of change on my desk, and now that I am aware things are missing, I know money has gone too.

I have a gut feeling who the culprit is but I don’t have any concrete evidence or the nerve to confront her. And, what if I am completely wrong? Eileen.

Dear Eileen, your gut feeling is often a good indicator that you are right.

That said, it would be unwise to confront someone over such a serious matter, especially if there is the slightest chance you got it wrong. Start by removing all temptation. Leave nothing on or around your desk, the back of your chair or on a coat stand. If you have a lockable desk drawer then use it.

There are lots of reasons people steal. Kleptomania is a mental disorder where people impulsively steal random items because the urge is so strong and powerful they cannot stop.

Studies show that shoplifting can also be linked to depression. And sometimes thieves steal to fund a lifestyle or habit they cannot afford. They become accustomed to the extra ‘income’ and continue until they get caught.

However, sadly there are people who would never dream of stealing, but find themselves in a position that they can’t even afford to buy a sandwich, and steal just to get by.

For all these reasons, I would speak to your HR advisor or manager who can deal with this situation in a compassionate and professional manner.

Dear Janice, I had high hopes for a new me in the New Year, but four days in to 2023 I broke every resolution!

I need to lose weight so vowed to give up alcohol, but ended up out with my friend for a few wines. I promised to give up carbs, then scoffed a fish supper. I planned a daily walk and have yet to put on my trainers. I am so disappointed with myself and feel I have failed before I have barely started.

How can I get the motivation I need. Jess.

Dear Jess, the failure rate for breaking New Year resolutions is 80%, so give yourself a break.

Try to focus on a healthier lifestyle rather than losing weight. One will follow the other.

Tell people your plans. That way it’s out in the open for friends and family to support you and it means you are less likely to fall off the rails if the world is watching!

Buddying up with someone is a massive help. Competition sets in so put up a wall chart to log your success. Drop a £2 coin in a jar each week at your weigh in and by the end of March the winner gets the cash.

Planning walks together means there is a far greater chance you will put those trainers on.

If it takes a few goes to get it right, so what? You are trying and at some point it will all fall into place. Good luck.

Dear Janice, I was engaged to the love of my life for five years until he broke up with me six months ago. He promised there was no-one else and said he just wanted to be on his own.

However, I was devastated to hear two months later that he met someone else.

I hear they are engaged and buying a new home in the same area we always planned to move to, and I am told that their wedding reception is the same hotel we were looking at too. It is one stab in the back after another. I feel bitter, lonely and angry because this female has stolen my love and my life.

How could he fall in love with someone else and move on so quickly, whereas I just sit and cry over my lost life. Sarah.

Dear Sarah, this other woman did not steal your man. This whole sad situation is caused by decisions your ex made.

To be brutally honest, if he did not marry you after five years, then it is highly unlikely he ever would. I know of many people who have gone through with a marriage because they didn’t have the courage to back out, and on every occasion it has ended in disaster.

It seems cruel to choose the same wedding venue and you could wallow over a million things, so start by refusing to listen to anything connected to this couple. Disconnect yourself from everything and anyone that causes you upset.

Be defiant and move on because this is now all about you. Create your new future. New friends, new hobbies, new places to visit. When you stop wallowing you will find that this new version of you will be happier than you have been for a very long time.

But ... make no effort and nothing will change. Please try.