Dear Janice,
Both of my friends have had their teeth done in Turkey and they look fabulous.
They assure me it was no big deal and as I have seen the results, they are encouraging me to do the same.
Trouble is, I’m such a nervous patient at the best of times, so the thought of getting surgery done on my whole mouth terrifies me, especially as it’s abroad.
Also, I have heard that not everyone has such a good outcome.
I can’t make my mind up. What should I do?
Sophie.
Dear Sophie,
I would take a massive step back and think hard about this.
Putting aside the fact that you’re a nervous dental patient, there are many other things to consider.
Dental work is considerably cheaper in Turkey compared to the UK, which is why, even counting in the cost of flights and accommodation, it seems like a no-brainer, and most people who have gotten their teeth done in Turkey are happy with the results, but as you say, not everyone has a happy outcome.
Health issues can follow such dental procedures, such as crowns and veneers falling out, infected gums, long-lasting pain, tooth loss, serious complications, and if you are unable to get a UK dentist to treat you, this can lead to return trips back to Turkey.
All in all, ask yourself this. Do you really need this invasive work done? Could you withstand the hours of surgery? Are you willing to take the risks that may follow?
Visit your UK dentist and chat about your options. Your dental work would be more expensive, but most have dental payment plans in place which might be another option to consider.
If not, then leave well alone.
Dear Janice,
My boyfriend is such a nice guy. My friends all love him and constantly tell me I’m so lucky to have finally met someone decent. Even my mum and dad say he is polite, respectful, and caring, and a refreshing change from the ‘bad boys’ I have dated in the past.
So, all in all, why am I bored senseless?
I know I should be grateful, but I now find that I am spending more time with my friends than him, and I even prefer going for walks on my own.
He is planning a holiday, but I keep stalling because I’ve never spent much alone time with him and I’m not sure how it would turn out.
He brings me flowers, and gifts and then I feel bad and realise I should be thankful I have found such a great guy.
Please tell me where my head is at because I can’t work it out.
KT.
Dear KT,
I’m sure this guy ticks many boxes, but if he doesn’t tick the ones labelled lust, love, passion, and excitement, to name but a few, then there is no future for you both.
Your friends mean well but ignore their advice. They are not in your shoes, so can’t feel the way you do. Sure, as good friends they want the best for you, and this flower-giving guy is seemingly doing all the things you would want a partner to do but…… you’re simply not a match.
This relationship sounds like death by a thousand cuts, so end it now and let this lovely guy move on to someone who wants to be with him for all the reasons I mentioned above, and not just because he’s a nice guy.
As for you, ditch the bad boys. Yes, they can be exciting but a nightmare too. So, keep looking for a good one, but one you will be desperate to book a holiday with, and one you will be excited to do not just the fun stuff with, but the mundane stuff too.
Be patient. I’m sure he’s out there somewhere. (Perhaps he’ll pop up on one of your lonesome walks!)
Dear Janice,
How do I tell my friend that her dad is having an affair? I have seen him a couple of times with another woman, and then my mum asked me if my friends’ parents had separated because she saw him with someone else too.
She has never said anything to me about any change in her home life, and I am wondering if it is best to leave her in the dark or tell her what my mum and I saw.
Either way, she might be really angry with me if I do tell her or keep quiet about what we saw.
She is very close to her dad, and I know that if this is true it will break her heart.
What should I do?
Karen.
Dear Karen,
Nothing. Stay well out of this family matter.
You and your mum may be right in your assumptions, but you have no facts, and even if you did, telling your friend what you’ve seen, puts her in an extremely complex position, caught between her parents and the truth.
If your friend’s dad is having an affair, it may fizzle out and no one gets hurt and, there may be a chance that her mum already knows or has an inkling that all is not good.
Things have a habit of unfolding without your intervention, so sit back and be there for your friend should the time come that she needs you.
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