Dear Janice,

After months of chasing a gorgeous girl, she finally agreed to go out with me, and I was ecstatic.

However, after a few dates, we got intimate and I was shocked to see that she has more hair than my nan!

I used to want to rip her clothes off, but now I want them to stay on.

My friends think it’s funny, but what do I do because, apart from this, we have great fun together?

Joel.

Dear Joel,

Firstly, I’d be concerned if you knew how much hair your nan had and, secondly, you shouldn’t make fun of this lovely girl as her personal hair situation could be a cultural or medical issue.

Lavish her with compliments and focus on her positives, then tell her there is only one thing you feel you need to bring up.

This may never have been an issue for her, so unless you less speak up, she will have no clue that her hairy bits are haunting you.

Dear Janice,

My wife and I agreed not to start our family for a few years, so I took it upon myself to surprise her with a puppy.

The puppy isn’t the problem, but my wife’s obsession with it is.

She cuddles it on her lap every evening whilst watching TV, and when we go to bed, it sleeps beside her all night.

Dog-friendly restaurants and pubs are our only options, and if we are at a wedding or party, we have to leave early in case it gets lonely!

This ‘present’ has caused endless disagreements and the last one ended in an almighty row because I suggested rehoming it.

She blew her top and has barely spoken to me since.

What started off as a kind gesture has backfired on me big time, but how can I make it right?

Stuart.

Dear Stuart,

It’s a blessing you decided not to start a family immediately, and I advise keeping it that way for the foreseeable future.

Albeit your wife appears to be rather overzealous towards this puppy, she has fallen in love with it and wants to nurture it in every way she can. (Although I don’t agree with it sleeping in your bed).

You, however, seem to be solely focused on how this puppy has affected the smooth running of your life.

Take note, when you do have a child it will sit on your wife’s lap, cuddle into bed with her on occasion, curtail your social life dramatically, and dictate where and when is a suitable place to go.

This might be the wake-up call you both need because your attitudes to co-parenting (puppy or child) are polar opposites and need serious thought.

And just so you know, it isn’t an option to rehome a baby if parenting becomes too much, so, put your big boy pants on and enjoy this new addition with your wife whilst she still is your wife!