A grandfather who was told he had months to live after his cancer returned 10 years ago has described how a last-ditch clinical trial saved his life - but left him traumatised by its "brutal" side effects.
George Fraser, 63, was diagnosed with Stage 3 head and neck cancer in 2012 after discovering a lump in his neck while shaving.
The former whisky industry worker, from Airdrie in Lanarkshire, underwent surgery to remove a tumour from the base of his tongue followed by six weeks of chemotherapy and six weeks of radiotherapy.
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Following the treatment, he turned to the charity Maggie's for support and embraced a wide range of activities including meditation and relaxation classes, nutrition support, and "kitchen table" chats with Maggie's advisors.
He and his partner, Jacqueline, had made a conscious decision not to talk about his cancer in the house, so Mr Fraser said going to Maggie's was "my wee place to open up".
Aged 53, however, the divorced father-of-two found that his cancer had returned, and was now Stage 4.
His consultant recommended radical neck surgery in a bid to remove the cancer, but the treatment was ultimately unsuccessful and Mr Fraser was told his condition was terminal.
"That was at the point where he said to me 'just go home and settle down, let things happen' - there was no more they could do," said Mr Fraser, who was told he had just months left to live.
A surprise breakthrough came during a visit to his local Maggie's centre when he was asked whether he had considered participating in a clinical trial for a new head and neck cancer drug, then taking place at the Beatson in Glasgow.
Mr Fraser said: "It really was hell, but I said to him 'it might not help me, but it might help somebody else'."
He added: "I’ve been in and out of hospital for years with the side effects.
"There were many times that we thought I was dying, and my family have been through everything with me.
"I don’t know how Jacqueline coped. I had uncontrollable double incontinence, I blew up to 22 stone and I had to be put under compression blankets because my body was swelling so fast.
"I also had aspiration pneumonia 18 times because food kept getting stuck at the back of my throat and going down into my lungs.”
Remarkably his cancer went into remission. He still has traces of tumour left on his carotid artery, but was described by his surgeon as a "walking miracle".
Despite the success, the experience left Mr Fraser mentally scarred. He was also suffering from repeated infections and was unable to eat properly.
He said: “At one point, I was being fed for four hours through a tube in the morning and then for another four hours in the evenings to get some nutrition into me.
"A lot of the joy had been taken out of my life and I was furious. I would lock myself away and then I would bite people heads off when they spoke to me.
"Eventually, I just retreated into myself. I couldn’t talk to anyone – I would take myself fishing and I would shout at the sky. I’d shout at the TV and the radio.
"Before, I’d been a happy go lucky person who walk talk to anyone, I’d have talked to the leg of the table, but after the trial I wasn’t the same person, I wasn’t me.
“Jacqueline eventually sat me down and gave me an ultimatum to go to my GP for help or leave the house.
"The GP realised I was reacting to everything that had happened to me. He prescribed anti-depressants and after four weeks, fortunately, I seemed to be able to lift myself.
"I thought I would lose Jacqueline through all of this because I was torture to live with, but we’ve got through it and she has been my rock through everything.”
Last year, George was offered a laryngectomy operation to try to stop recurrent pneumonia infections and allow him to eat more easily.
He has also returned to Maggie's - something he said he felt unable to face during his "dark times".
He said: "I’ve made some wonderful new friends. Men need that support, to talk about cancer as much as anybody, and for me Maggie’s is the place to do that."
Mr Fraser shared his experience as a survey by Maggie's found that 42% of men had not sought help to cope with a cancer diagnosis, despite feelings of anxiety, guilt, loneliness and embarrassment.
A fifth (21%) of the men said they did not want to talk about their feelings.
Nationally men account for 51% of new cancer diagnoses each year, but they make up only a third of visitors to Maggie's centres despite the charity offering dedicated men's support groups.
Maggie’s chief executive Dame Laura Lee said: “Cancer can come with a loss of identity and treatment can feel very exposing.
"We have to help men get over the stigma of thinking that there is embarrassment or shame attached to asking for support.
“Sharing how you feel in a group session, with other men, can help make cancer feel more manageable.
"At Maggie’s we would love to see the same number of men coming for support in our centres as we do women.”
For more information on Maggie's services, visit www.maggies.org
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